Last week, I started a pocket notebook. I'd been wanting to start one for a long while, and had tried many times to start one. However, perfectionism had poisoned my consistency and caused me to fail each time. Now though, I've been using this pocket notebook for a week straight and am really happy with it.
"... It feels so good to write that all out. I'm going to be so grateful to be able to reflect on this stuff, later... Should I journal like this, from now on? It's something to seriously consider. It feels great and efficient, but like cheating at journaling." [Me, writing in my pocket notebook on day two]
In my daily journaling practice, I've been feeling really blocked-up and stuck. My words haven't been flowing well and it's been feeling like a chore, rather than something I enjoy. This has upset me greatly, but I've been sticking through it because I am not about to give up my daily-journaling habit of 4.5 years. However, this new system has removed that pressure that long-form journaling has been weighing on me. In this pocket notebook, I don't worry about forming full sentences or paragraphs - I just write bullet points, half-coherent sentences, doodles, etc.. It's freeing.
I don't know. Deep in my heart, I consider this pocket notebook system to still count as daily journaling. However, I'm having a hard time truly convincing myself. Why? I guess it all comes back to that desire for perfection and going "all out". This pocket notebook is not aesthetic, nor perfect. It's not keeping all my memories in detail, or beautiful to look at. However, at this rate, neither is my long-form journal. Actually, I need to remind myself of the concept I wrote in the start of my pocket notebook - "Messy notes are better than no notes. A full notebook is filled with messy pages."
I need to change my perspective. At this rate, my long-form daily journaling practice is not sustainable. I'm not writing full entries and it's no longer serving me or is efficient. This pocket notebook is actually helping me capture more, process more, and enjoy the practice more. It's time for a change. This doesn't mean that I can't long-form journal, sometimes. However, from now on, I think it's time to switch to this method of bullet-point journaling. That's scary to admit, but all change is scary. I'll get used to it.